SET SAIL: FIRST IMPRESSIONS

[returnjourney]

SET SAIL: FIRST IMPRESSIONS

January 1, 2022 – January 7, 2022
Welcome to the new year and the Return Journey's opening event! We're starting with something light to get everyone acclimated and so no one feels they've missed too much if they app after the holiday season. We'd like to make it easy for any new players to jump in right away.

If you have any questions about the event, please ask here.

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1. What? My name is who? My name is—

Salutations! Now that everyone's respective warden and inmate orientations are out of the way, you've been given a helpful, mandatory name tag. It instantly appears on your shirt and can't be taken off, though where it appears on your shirt is a bit more unpredictable; it's an imperfect science, so it's just as likely to pop up on the back of your shirt as the front. If you try to remove your clothes, the tag appears on your skin; they're waterproof, so a quick shower won't get rid of it, either. What can we say — it's mandatory.

While the tags all follow the standard "HELLO my name is" format and have your name or most common alias, they also include some other information. For wardens, it features a space that declares "I LIKE" and one or two of your most choices hobbies. For inmates, it features these hobbies and "I have killed [x] people" (this may be a specific number or something akin to "a lot of" or "no"). Fun icebreaker, right?

2. Twenty Questions

Speaking of icebreakers, a brief announcement summons everyone to the observatory. Again, yes, it's mandatory; wardens must retrieve absent inmates before any more information is revealed. Better hop to it!

Upon arrival, passengers will discover that the Peregrine's resident bot force has reconfigured the observatory with small, portable cubicles, each with a transparent wall that retains a lovely view of the observatory's massive window. Each inmate is assigned their own cubicle and, upon entering, cannot leave without a warden's say so; the door only unlocks with a warden's CommLink.

Wardens are tasked with interviewing at least one inmate, to get a feel for their prospective charges. They can have as much time as they need to formulate what questions they want to ask, but that might leave some inmates waiting. Maybe that's on purpose, though. In any case, the exercise is over once an inmate is asked five questions and a warden receives five answers.

Archimedes will collect name tags after the interviews for incineration. The robotic owl is, notably, the only one who can remove them.

3. Polite Picnic

The greenhouse doesn't always have enough fresh produce to go around (and often what is collected is frozen and preserved), but given the circumstances — a new mission and new passengers — everyone can reap the rewards this month...if they share. A bot stationed in the mess hall mechanically tells anyone who crosses into range (whether they mean to visit the produce table or not) that they aren't to take more than three fruits and/or vegetables. If you choose not to abide by the rules...well, that depends if you're caught and by who.

The produce available are as follows:

Adalfane: Tastes like cocaine, but very nutritious, especially when eaten raw.
Tuadath: Smells awful, but very hearty when cooked, tasting a little like steak.
Tsanyi: Pure, sugary sweetness. Can be made into a refreshing drink, eaten raw, or sprinkled over a desert.

There are notably fewer tsanyi than adalfane or tuadath. But if everyone's nice and cooperates, each person can get exactly one.

Comments

2 (drug ref)

[saklas]

The inmate has somehow, despite being here for like less than two hours, already been hit hard enough in the nose to bleed. There's a tissue stuffed up there to keep it from going everywhere.

He blinks blearily at Ezio. He looks kind of shell-shocked. There's no way this guy that just came in is actually dressed like a pirate in real life, so, okay, let's just not bring it up.

Fuck. Fuck. He can't tell where he is. It's either a hospital or a police station. The guy's demeanor says police, to him.

"Did you run out of evidence to snort, or something? Go away. I'm not talking without my attorney present."

[hiddenblade]

Ah, someone bloodied. Odorous, too, and underfed-looking enough that Ezio might have mistaken him for some poor stablehand or street urchin if he wasn't evidently a grown man.

"Who is your attorney? I will summon him for you," Ezio replies, settling into the booth with absolutely no intention of going anywhere, much less summoning anyone. He pauses and gives a flippant hand gesture, and adds: "We will see if that counts as one of the questions."

[saklas]

"Michael San Miguel."

He is twice as powerful as an ordinary Michael, and Volk has heard the name enough times that it no longer registers as funny. He rattles off a telephone number.

"If you hadn't replaced my phone, I'd have called him myself."

He holds up his CommLink like it's a whoopie cushion he found on his chair. "Why? By the way. Why."

Is he doing a good job of pretending he's not seeing the building as a spaceship with cyborgs in it? Yes. Yes he's pretty sure he is. Good job, Volk.

[hiddenblade]

Ezio has only a faint idea of what those numbers mean, but even with more clarity, it would not help him here: Michael San Miguel is countless miles away, and Ezio Auditore has seldom cared for any legal process. He pulls out his own CommLink, and skims through the inboxes.

"No Michael," he confirms, and he drops the communicator on the table. He shrugs, the bit over. "I am afraid that is out of my hands. Wardens here are not given any choice in these things. I am more used to pigeons for communications, myself."

[saklas]

"OhHHHH, you're just in here to fuck with me!" Wow! Cool! We love to see it!

"Really cool. Very mature. You seem like a great guy."

Volk scoots his chair back so he can lean against the wall, stretches his legs out, and shuts his eyes. He can outwait this bullshit, watch him.

[hiddenblade]

"If not a great man, then a great thorn in the sides of many," Ezio replies, unhesitating and without a trace of humility. He knows what he is. "As you will be in my side, it seems, if you would rather sleep than answer some simple questions."

[saklas]

A thorn! Awww. Exactly what he was going for.

"Flattery will get you everywhere, but not today. I have other stuff I could be doing. Have to be doing, actually! Some of us have a nine to five that doesn't revolve around traffic stops."

[hiddenblade]

"Doing what? Indulge me, just a little. Since you are already here."

He'll throw away a question. It's fine. Who is really counting?

[saklas]

"What - how the hell are you going to tell me I'm dead and I'm here to repent for my horrible crimes if you don't even know who I am?"

This is very particular phrasing from Volk. Generally speaking, there are only three reasons to be in entertainment: you love the work, you love yourself and think everyone else should love you too, or the very narrow ways in which you're a functional person don't overlap with anything else.

Asked about what he does for a living, he thinks of it as who I am. Maybe it's all three.

[hiddenblade]

"I do not know your mind or even the reasons you are here," Ezio replies, mildly, and he rakes his gaze over Volk again. The worst of men that he's known have been men who would hardly deign to lift a finger, let alone a sword. And why would it be any other way? There is only so much damage even the most strapping young man can do with his own two hands.

The scrawny, the old, the infirm, they all make quick use of power and policy.

No need to be impressive to look at.

"How horrible?"

[saklas]

Volk doesn't deign to lift jack shit.

"I go into yoga studios and I put the incenses in the wrong order so people's chakras end up all fucked up. It's because I love negativity."

[hiddenblade]

"I do not know what the fuck any of that means," Ezio remarks curtly.

[saklas]

"You don't know what negativity is? Boy are you in for a fun time."

Volk rolls his neck.

"Okay. I'll do something different, but only because I'm such a cooperative guy. The horrible thing I do is sell babies in cans and tell people it's tuna. Fishing is hard."

[hiddenblade]

Not for the first time, it occurs to him how effective it was to talk a constant stream of shit as a boy, bidding other men into fights for him. On the other end, it feels just as annoying as it was intended to be, and the frustration starts to creep in.

"What do you expect to get out of spouting nonsense like this?"

[saklas]

"Are you familiar with the expression 'I don't come to where you work and tell you how to flip burgers?' Well, you did."

Volk taps the tabletop. If he can't be home, he can't work.

"And now I can't flip my burgers, sweetie! And until I can again, I'm going to make your job as hard as I can. Okay?"

His voice has lifted into a sugary, I-need-to-speak-to-your-manager whine. It sucks.

[hiddenblade]

Well, at least he knows what a burger is.

"You are an inconvenience at most," Ezio replies. "I have half a mind to stop asking questions and let you sit in silence a while, if you do not intend to comport yourself like a grown man."

[saklas]

"I would love that. Thanks."

[hiddenblade]

"Suit yourself, then," Ezio replies, and he gets up to leave. "If no one else comes by and finds you agreeable, I will make sure you get dinner."

[saklas]

"Aww, you're a peach." Volk blows a kiss, already leaning back against the wall to try to catch a nap. "Bye now!"