this is the part where prison is more or less dave and busters

[saklas]

Passengers: Everyone who wants to come see what the weird vending machine is about for the first time it is open to them! This is an open mingle/party style log.
Location: "a corner," the location of the Commissary
Date: February 1 - 7 on year one of our cool and sexy journey
Summary: 14 space idiots squint at the ATM that can supposedly make elk meat and clown shoes for them
Warnings: Will add as needed! I'm 90% sure someone's going to ask for drugs or blades, just as a weather forecast

Comments

[rank1]

[He bobs his head, and all that pent up energy building up to a scrap seems to settle into something satisfied with even the idea of going up against some Terminator motherfucker who can control the environment. God, it's been too long. His fingers flex to grip, but there's nothing there. Way way way too long.]

And he puts up this incredible fight, and it's real. No pulled punches, only cuts where it's subtle. No fucking CGI, not wherever you can avoid it. My eyes always glaze over at that shit, trying to make one medium something that it isn't. Just a man against a machine who has forsaken his humanity. Shit. That'd be cool.

[saklas]

Fuck yeah.

[Volk nods.]

CGI gets a bad rep, anything looks fake if the person using it is bad at their job. I can do it without, though. Budget will be interesting, but I can argue for it, and I can definitely get the reanimators. You want to play yourself?

[In this thing that's definitely not happening because they're both in prison.]

[rank1]

[Travis is completely into this happening.]

One hundred percent, man. I'm a little out of shape now, but I can get back into it no problem. If I can do it for real, then I can do it for film, you know? I've always wanted to be in a movie.

[saklas]

Fight a space station for real?

[Volk has clicked into his element here, and his amused smile doesn't even have any hard, mean edge in it.]

[rank1]

I mean, not a fucking space station. But I'm the top-ranked assassin in North America. I've seen some weird shit, fought it, and killed it.

[And he's a gamer. All of that experience counts.]

[saklas]

[K, so he's heard this before and it sounds made up this time too.]

Isn't the point of assassinating to not be seen or caught doing it?

[rank1]

The point of assassinating someone is killing them. But people in the know... they know.

[saklas]

[Oh boy. This is going to be like the space thing with Rhys, meaning that it's not going to be something he can argue with, and it adds one more point to Volk's tally. He's not even surprised any more.]

That's pretty cool. Uhm. Yeah, this sounds like it'll be fun, hopefully no one will die for real.

[rank1]

Cut for stage, right? [He laughs. Like that's a joke.]

[saklas]

Depends. Are you also doing your own stunts?

[It's pointless to ask actors to Not fuck up their bodies, so Volk just doesn't try any more, but not passing out inside of a scene is a great quality.]

[rank1]

Yeah, totally. I can do whatever.

[saklas]

Okay, then don't actually dehydrate. We'll touch you up in post, it's fine. Eli Pompeii doesn't even work out, you know, they just airbrush him.

[This is just a rumor, Volk has not met anyone that famous, ever.]

Either that or I can have someone double you - that's also easy. Picture of you, one of those big printer racks that uses biological pigments, bam.

[rank1]

Dude, no, if we're doing this, I'm going to be ripped. I used to be cut, I used to do the gym for hours every day, and I was working through all of it. For me, it's gotta be real.

[34 feels a lifetime away from 29 but. You know.]

[saklas]

[eh fuck it this thing is never happening anyway.]

You're the talent.

[That's "whatever your baby brain needs you fucking maniac just please show up on time so the rest of us can work" in Volk's stock talking-to-actors speak.]

I'll get you a trainer, you can't park your car on the street where I live without having to scrape personal trainers off of the windshield in the morning.

[rank1]

[Travis is, regretfully, too into the idea to even notice he's being condescended to.]

Thanks. ["All of mine are dead!"] Does the company pay for it?

[saklas]

Oh, hell yeah. You can expense everything. Start demanding weird foods, see what people do.

...Don't, actually, they complain to me when that happens. But you could.

[rank1]

[What a crazy thing to think about: people just paying for your shit. He hasn't had that since he was a kid.]

I gotta try it just to say that I did. Just once, so that you don't get your shit canned. Authentic wagyu beef or something!

[saklas]

No, no, they won't fire me for it, it'll just be the caterer who's already running around trying to feed two hundred people every day on a set that moves around. We can do good meat, trust me. Its the things like - I had a lead on Passage - dont tell people about this, it'll be in a tabloid - that would only eat what her boyfriend ate, and she was raw vegan and he was keto and they both only wanted local farm food. We were like 'is that what you do at home'? And of course, no, they just go to the fucking store, but we're Sunshine Court so obviously we have the resources to accommodate this oooone tiny thing -

Like, sweetie, what do you want. They built southern Augustin on a swamp that nobody normal could use. Turana figured it out because she's like, a miracle worker, but talk about starving artists.

[rank1]

["Sweetie." Travis looks a little amused.]

You'd think your version of LA would be set up to deal with that shit, it's like Hollywood standard, right? It's pretty fuckin' wild that you guys have keto though, I was kinda hoping that was a really localized hell. You guys have crossfit, too? What a bunch of idiots.

[Hey, this is exciting: shit talking bad health practices. Can't do that at home because his wife loves her belt exercise machine.]

[saklas]

It's like - what is local! Nothing is local unless you like to eat catfish and crawfish and... other fish. Alligators. Lotus, maybe?

We have crossfit. I mean, I've heard of it, but it's completely someone else's job to know what it is. How do you have time to exercise?

I mean, not here. Here we have literally nothing to do. There isn't even a gym. I think even actual prisons have gyms.

[rank1]

There's a gym here, you just need a fuckin' warden to open it up. I've just been training whatever quiet area I can find instead of asking. [He glances over Volk, a little dubiously.] Would you even use it?

[saklas]

I mean, like.

Wouldn't that be hilarious?

[absolutely the fuck no he will not use it, it's the principle of the thing.]

[rank1]

At least a little. [A scoff of a laugh.] You don't look like you've been inside a gym in your life.

[saklas]

I don't like doing things that I already know I'm going to be bad at.

[rank1]

Everyone's shit at everything first. You buy into that "if at first you don't succeed, destroy all proof you tried" shit?